Honky Tonkitis

Here's where you talk to the band

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The US Government shutdown that went into place Tuesday has now had an impact locally. Local band, Honky Tonkitis, has found itself affected by the funding shutdown.

"I don't know how this works or why," lead singer and bassist Johnny Maplewood explained,"but the band's telling me that as long as the shutdown is in place, I'm not allowed to sing or talk at shows."

Maplewood was unclear on the details.

"I'm not really sure how it came into effect. I was just told by the other members of the band that as long as the Government shutdown goes on, I'm not allowed a voice at shows."

"It's kind of complicated," guitarist Bruce Dean elaborated, "All we know is that Johnny's not allowed to sing, talk, nothing like that. He can still play bass, but according to the Government shutdown rules, nothing else."

"Yeah, we got the call with the order," drummer Kurt Weber added. "From these guys. They sounded like they were from the Government. So hey, we've got to follow the rules. We don't want anyone to get in trouble here. We've got to follow the rules for the shutdown."

"As we understand it, though, backing vocals will still be allowed," fiddle player Larry Gääärd noted. "It's going to sound a little weird, but we tried it in practice the other night, and I'm beginning to like it. What's more, I like the silences between songs where Johnny used to talk. Now it's just quiet. I kind of wish this Government shutdown thing had happened a long time ago."

Singer Maplewood was visibly flustered. "I just don't get why this is happening. We don't have any government ties. I mean, yeah, we pay taxes, but beyond that, we're not supported in any way by the Federal Government. And it doesn't appear to have impacted any other bands in the city. I just have to question: why me?"

At this point, accordionist Don Turner cut Maplewood off. "I'm afraid that the shutdown says you can't even talk for interviews. And if I have to fire a couple warning shots over your head to get you to stop, well, I'd hate to do it, but I gotta follow the rules."

Johnny Maplewood bass

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